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Issue 10
Fall 2005

Helping America procrastinate since 1636

January 16, 2021

Network Hopes "Middle Class Cattle Drive" Will Be Hit with Viewers

ODOR SPRINGS, CO - For viewers who thought they had seen it all when it comes to reality T.V., a new delight is in store this fall with the forthcoming FOX spectacle, "Middle Class Cattle Drive," the network's mildly saucy answer to the wildly popular E! show "Filthy Rich Cattle Drive," which chronicles the adventures of a motley crew of (mostly) rich and (somewhat) famous characters as they ride the open range.

While viewers who had tuned in to the E! show no doubt followed the self-obsessed sagas of the daughter of the guy who founded Yahoo!, one of George Forman's creatively- named progeny, and the son of former criminal defendant Robert Blake, Fox is hoping that Americans will follow with equal passion the travails of their own cast, including the son of an accountant, the daughter of a small business owner and a pair of Hungarian twins whose family owns a restaurant in Duluth.

"What's different about this show," said Johnny Hollywood, the show's executive producer, "is that anyone out there watching the show could be doing these same things. On that other show, if someone loses a cell phone, they can have daddy put one on the nearest space shuttle and have the astronauts drop it off. With our show, these kids will have to walk to a pay phone, call their dad's office and have the secretary take a message, then once the proper paperwork has been filled out, the phone company will send them a new phone the old fashioned way - through the mail!" he said, stomping his foot for emphasis.

"By the time they get back home to their two bedroom apartment in a nice but remote part of the city which they share with one or two other people, the show will be over. That's drama. That's magic. That's what people will tune in to see."  HSP 





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