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Issue 17
Spring 2009
Helping America procrastinate since 1636
March 23, 2023
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Comedians Struggle to Make Fun of President Obama
HSP Eagerly Plagiarizes Shepard Fairey
LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
Want To Run HSP?
SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY
Nature, Science
Introduce Each Other As Sub-Journals
Cambridge Residence Suspected of Housing Sweatshop
Tourists Discover New Species of Squirrel in Harvard Yard
Ghost of Isaac Newton Vandalizes Rival's Wikipedia Article
Top Ten Worst Distributed Supercomputing Projects
Facebook Now Open to Prison Population
Massachusetts Decriminalizes Crime
Senators Turn to Twitter For On-The-Go Filibusters
Overwhelmed By American Flag Pins, Al-Quaida Disbands
EYE ON THE ECONOMY
Harvard Yard To Become Parking Lot
HSP Finally Lampoons Drew Faust
Black Hole Out-sucked By Economy
ENTERTAINMENT
NBC Preps Watchmen For Network Premiere
Celine Dion and 50 Cent Team Up For New Album
Alex Rodriguez Accuses Michelle Obama of Steroid Use
HSP COMICS
KLAUS
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DIEGO
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E.O. Wilson is Sick and Tired of Ants
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STILLS
Clinton Recommends Not Jogging Because You Still Get Heart Attacks
Harvard Gate-Closing Policy Thwarts Only Laziest of Criminals
Globe Stores: Yet Another Example of Capitalism Exploiting the Earth For Profit
Man Runs Out of Checks, Has to Wait Six Weeks
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