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Issue 17
Spring 2009
Helping America procrastinate since 1636
April 12, 2026
 
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 TOP STORY MORE NEWS FROM THE ARCHIVES
Comedians Struggle to Make Fun of President Obama
HSP Eagerly Plagiarizes Shepard Fairey

 LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
Want To Run HSP?

 SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY
Nature, Science Introduce Each Other As Sub-Journals
Cambridge Residence Suspected of Housing Sweatshop
Tourists Discover New Species of Squirrel in Harvard Yard
Ghost of Isaac Newton Vandalizes Rival's Wikipedia Article
Top Ten Worst Distributed Supercomputing Projects

Facebook Now Open to Prison Population
Massachusetts Decriminalizes Crime
Senators Turn to Twitter For On-The-Go Filibusters
Overwhelmed By American Flag Pins, Al-Quaida Disbands

 EYE ON THE ECONOMY
Harvard Yard To Become Parking Lot
HSP Finally Lampoons Drew Faust
Black Hole Out-sucked By Economy

 ENTERTAINMENT
NBC Preps Watchmen For Network Premiere
Celine Dion and 50 Cent Team Up For New Album
Alex Rodriguez Accuses Michelle Obama of Steroid Use

HSP COMICS
 KLAUS (PDF)
DIEGO (PDF)
Bad Publicity, My Ass! You Must Be Taking Crazy Pills

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 STILLS


Fallen Korean Stem Cell Scientist Stuns World With Claims of Phallic Enhancement



Anthology of Short Fiction Mysteriously Found Next To Orange Juice


 


Octuple Citizen Pays More than Entire Income in Taxes



UFO Sighting Turns Out Just to Be Some Trees


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