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Issue 17
Spring 2009

Helping America procrastinate since 1636

August 18, 2018
 
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 HSP STILLS FROM THE ARCHIVES
Issue 17
Spring 2009


Obama Promises To Have All Troops Out of Iraq By 1991



Scientists Discover Cure For Cure For Obesity



Verizon Guy Finally Calls Cops on Creepy Legion of Stalkers



GOP Suffers From Brown-Black Color Blindness



Soon-To-Be-Fired Intern Sneaks F-Word Into Teleprompter



Area Man Spends Hour Thinking Of Perfect Username, Password



Robots Also Look to Canada For Health Care Needs



Indian Woman Can’t Believe Slumdog Won With That Dance Number



AIG Donates Bonuses to Pro Athletes



Rorschach Gets Flak For New Hat



Nite Owl Stays Up Late



If Watchmen Had Been Made in 1989



Silk Spectre Demands Equal Pay



A-Rod Admits Using Performance Enhancing Wooden Stick Since 1994



Harvard No Longer Well-Endowed



Grad Student Fails to Find Synonym For "Thesaurus"



Homeless Man Refinances Box



Democrat Declares Republicans Undateable



Picture Removed Due To Budget Constraints

















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