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Issue 13
Spring 2007
Helping America procrastinate since 1636
August 03, 2020
 
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 TOP STORY MORE NEWS FROM THE ARCHIVES
Al Gore Credits Emotion Chip With Resurgence in Popularity
Oscar winner, environmental activist, former United States Vice President and presidential candidate Al Gore is a popular man... (more)

 HEALTH AND MEDICINE
Fearing Pandemic, COOTIES Vaccine Required for Harvard Enrollment
American Red Cross Expands Give-Away Program

 HARVARD NEWS
Harvard Undergraduate Just Can't Stop Helping Others
Teaching Fellows Desperately Want More Teaching Conferences
Photo of Yale's "We Suck" Prank Shown to Be Doctored

Bush Calls for Massive Troop Surge in America's Heartland
In what he deems a "strategic redeployment," President Bush is calling for a massive troop surge into America's heartland... (more)

 DOMESTIC POLITICS
In the Shadow of Rusting Steel Mills, the Struggle for Ninja Rights Continues
Clinton and Obama Court Black Vote with Reparations Packages

HSP COMICS
 KLAUS (PDF)

 ENTERTAINMENT
Rainbow Bright Goes Goth

 UPDATE ON THE ENVIRONMENT
Discovery Channel Screenshots

 TRUTH IN ADVERTISING
Google and Transatlantic Swimming
Girl Continually Hit On By Local Tree

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 STILLS


Clinton Recommends Not Jogging Because You Still Get Heart Attacks



Harvard Gate-Closing Policy Thwarts Only Laziest of Criminals


 


Globe Stores: Yet Another Example of Capitalism Exploiting the Earth For Profit



Man Runs Out of Checks, Has to Wait Six Weeks


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