By I.M. Kleen - Graduate student Mark P.
Terfelhowzer got the surprise if his life Monday
morning while taking his biennial shower. Instead of
coming out of the bathroom clean
and devoid of dirt, the 45 year old
comparative literature student
emerged covered head to toe in
dark chocolate and melted vanilla
ice cream.
“What a moron,” noted roommate
and long-time friend Weezelby
Montague, “This is worse than the
time he mistook Snausages brand nutritious dog
treats for Jimmy Dean healthy long-life inducing
breakfast patties!”.
“Believe it nor this happens a lot,” Said Mortimer T.
Dovewyle, Chairman and CEO of the Dove
Corporation and 12th generation descendant of
Count Hezekiah Jethro Dovewyle The Fifth, the man
who started the Dove Corporation in a small hut
behind his castle in Normandy sometime in the middle
of the 4th century BCE. The original
Dove Corporation sold mostly
magic amulets, swords and very few
ice cream bars.
“This was before freezers were
around,” explained Dovewyle, “So
they had to have a serf stand next
to a block of ice holding a bag of
milk. Believe me, you don't want to
know how they made the chocolate.”
“I suppose it could have been worse,” said
Terflhowzer, looking thoughtful, “I
guess I could have eaten a bar of
soap.”
HSP
Issue 12
