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Issue 17
Spring 2009
Helping America procrastinate since 1636
January 29, 2026
 
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 health and medicine FROM THE ARCHIVES
Medical School Application Timeline
Spring 2006
FDA Withdraws Soma
Spring 2005
Mike Huckabee Warns of Declining Stork Population, Extinction of Human Race
Spring 2008
Rock of Crack Gets Ph.D. in Biochemistry From Harvard
Winter 2003
Fearing Pandemic, COOTIES Vaccine Required for Harvard Enrollment
Spring 2007



In the Shadow of Rusting Steel Mills, the Struggle for Ninja Rights Continues

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