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Issue 16
Fall 2008

Helping America procrastinate since 1636

October 17, 2018
 
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 HSP ASKS AMERICA RELATED ARTICLES

Will White Working Class Democrats Vote For Obama?

Frederick Sandofsky
Movie Ticket
Guy

The tax money I'd save would never cover the enjoyment I receive from racism. You can't put a price on that!
Samantha Henderson
Professional Temp

With what's been going on these past 7+ years, I don't think America can handle another tall president.
Jake Smalley
Homeland Security Guard

Look, even if the guy's completely innocent, I just can't vote for a member the Bin Laden family.
Mary McConnell
Personal Home Manager

His wife is just too good looking. Frankly, its a little intimidating.
Sharon Holbrook
Homeless Shelter
Coordinator

Sorry, I just can't stand Community Organizers.
Jimmy Penderton
Denny's Restaurant
Manager

Scientists just proved racism reduces stress. No universal health care plan can give me that kind of peace of mind.
Homer Simpson
Nuclear
Technician

D'Oh! There's no way I can support such a shitty bowler.
Agatha P. Cottonhead
Widowed Plantation
Owner

Certainly not. It might encourage another slave uprising!
Chet Huntington, III
Investment
Banker

As the token black Democrat earning $250K/yr, I'm even more afraid of a black guy robbing me than you are.
Joe Biden
Second Poorest
US Senator

I'm considering it, but really, what's in it for me?

 HSP 



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