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Issue 08
Fall 2004

Helping America procrastinate since 1636

October 31, 2020
 
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Animal Still Exists Somewhere in Nepal

KARAKORUM, NEPAL - Several of America's largest industrialists were angered today when it was discovered that somewhere in the country of Nepal, some sort of animal has yet to be killed by hunters or big industry. Executive Vice President Robert J. Womac of Ford Motor company said, "I don't know how this rogue beast has escaped the scrutiny of our comprehensive nature-removal programs, but rest assured that we will find it and hunt it down."

The animal itself declined to comment and continued to search in vain for paltry scraps of food in the tundra.  HSP 




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